Last Updated on July 28, 2023 by Mike
Can a Marriage be Restored After an Affair?
Why do married people succumb to illicit and clandestine affairs? Although affairs can become temporarily exciting and invigorating, it usually brings a painful and destructive ending to all involved. It is also one of the common causes of shattered marriages that leave everyone in an emotional hellhole, especially the children. Depending on the situation, some marriages can still be restored after an affair. However, the process of rebuilding and restoring the marriage relationship can become difficult, with a lot of roller coaster of emotions and deliberate and painful healing process. Sometimes, an affair can also bring a second chance in love for someone who has gone bitter over his or her own marriage.
Common reasons why people have an affair
- To seek attention and affection not found at home. Sometimes, marriage couples are so caught up in the maze of raising a family that they soon forget each other’s personal needs, including sex. Sometimes the partner would try to get sexual satisfaction elsewhere just to fill the void.
Physical attraction to others. Some people just could not ignore a thing of beauty. As part of human sinful nature, some are enticed to eat the forbidden fruit just to satiate their earthly lust. It usually starts with flirting, then perhaps just a one-night affair, or sometimes it can become a habitual affair that is based on pure physical need. Although, there are times when it could also lead to some emotional attachment where the real danger begins.
Blast from the past. Well, some affairs can start by the appearance of old flames or exes where both are enticed to once again ignite and relive the passion of the good old days. It could be just for old time’s sake, or it could also be because the feelings are still there. It could start out harmless at first with just “hi and hello’s” and then a talk about “what could have been” and finally “perhaps it’s not too late”. You know the drill.
Not happy with marriage. Whether the home has become a battlefield, or one has become so sick and tired of his or her partners inadequacies, one will find someone for diversion either temporarily or permanently. This scenario usually leads to divorce.
There are many other reasons why people succumb to illicit affairs. Whether it is meant to be just a temporary respite from the hubbub of marriage life and not totally intended to end a marriage, most people lose control of their emotions along the way, and hence a trivial affair could become so explosive it will destroy everyone near it. There are so many risks involve in playing with fire. Most often than not, it gets more complicated the more you hang onto it. The longer you stay in an affair, the more damages you will attract. Even if your partner never finds out, you will constantly live in guilt and hence sabotaging your own peace of mind. The affair can also destroy you and your lover’s quality of life as you both live in seclusion and constant fear of being found out. Before you ever start a flame, always bear in mind that it can burn you, and the degree of burn is something that doctors won’t be able to help. So be aware, and beware!
A good post. Well affairs for married people might give temporary pleasure and attention not found at home. But in the broader context, it might lead the marriage to a divorce. What happens to the kids? They also get mentally disturbed and grow up in a place of uncertainty and feel insecure. Not only the husband and wife are affected, the most affected are the kids followed by other family members, relatives and sometimes the friends as well.
A relative of mine had an affair with his wife. The family was shocked when we found out. He and his wife were able to work things out, but I constantly wonder how their relationship is going. It’s interesting reading this blog post and finding out some reasons people have affairs. It makes me wonder what the reason was that my relative had his affair.
I am one of those people who had an affair after an old flame from high school came back into my life. To be honest, it was exhilarating to be with my ex, and it made me feel at least ten years younger. However, when my wife found out, my world crashed and we wound up getting a divorce. We tried counseling for a few months, but the pain that I caused was insurmountable. After some time passed, I now realize that I wasn’t truly happy in my marriage and perhaps the affair was a symptom of my dissatisfaction. If you are going to have an affair, be warned — you are playing with fire! It probably won’t end the way you imagine.